Have Kids When You’re Ready

Having a child is a very personal decision that should be made by a woman and her partner. Of course, women have kids all the time unexpectedly, but when possible, you should make the decision to have your kids when you want them. Just because you are getting pressured to have kids sooner rather than later doesn’t mean you have to. If you want kids, have them when you want to have them.

Having a child is a lot of work, and will completely change how you are able to live your life. You will suddenly lose a large majority of your free time, and much of your energy and money will be poured into the child. If you’re not ready for these changes yet in your life, then it’s totally fine to wait. It’s also perfectly acceptable to not have kids if you decide they’re not for you. Ultimately, you’ll be responsible for another human life and you absolutely need to be ready for having a child.

If you choose to wait on having kids, make sure you talk with your doctor about potential health issues as your body may struggle more to support having a baby at an older age. You should be discussing pregnancy with your doctor regardless of your age, but as you get older it becomes even more important to make sure you know how well your body might respond. Your doctor will know better than anyone online, so be sure you’re talking with them when you are ready.

Besides health related questions, one of the biggest worries that older parents have is how old they’ll be when their kids get to be older. If you’re 40 or older, there’s a good chance that you’ll be over 60 years old before your child moves out of the house. Ultimately, this may seem difficult, but it’s something that millions of parents have gone through over the years. Are there things that you may not be able to do that you would have if you were younger? Possibly. It depends on how you age. However, the most demanding years physically will be up until your child is about 4 years old. You’ll likely still be young enough that you’ll be able to meet these demands.

Even if you are older than other parents, your child is still going to love you no matter what. Your child won’t have much of an understanding that you are much older than them or other parents until they’re older themselves. To most kids, all adults are old and 10 to 15 years older really isn’t that big of a difference to them for someone that’s already "old." You’re old, and they’re young regardless of how old you actually are.

There are plenty of reasons why you might choose to have kids later in your adulthood. First off, you may not feel that you’re ready to commit to taking care of another human being. It’s absolutely critical that you are ready and willing to sacrifice much of your time and energy for your child - showing them that you love them and following through on that is extremely important for kids.

Additionally, having kids is expensive. If you don’t think that you can financially support them then waiting is totally valid. Most adults earn more money the older they get, so if you’re not in a position to take care of them just yet, then wait until you are. Raising a child in poverty can set them back extremely far in life - while many parents do it, it’s certainly better if you don’t have to.

Choose to have kids when you’re ready. If you don’t want to have kids, that’s totally acceptable as well. You want to bring your child up the best you can, and if that means it’s later in your life then make that decision accordingly.