Finding Time For Your Hobbies

Once you have kids, your life is going to change in a significant way. Not only will you be responsible for another human being, but much of the time that used to be your own time is no longer yours. That time will now be taken up raising a child, and potentially more than one child, depending on what you decide.

Having kids can be extremely rewarding, but it can also be extremely demoralizing as well. There will be ups and downs throughout all stages of your child’s life. While some people love to be a parent, and it’s natural for them, most people are not built that way. Being a parent takes a lot of work and effort, and is emotionally draining.

In order to keep your energy high, it’s important to not focus solely on your child all of the time. You have to take care of yourself and your own emotional needs as well. Doing things that you find fun and like to do are critical to help you maintain a happy and healthy emotional balance in your life.

When you have kids, all of your free time and hobbies that you enjoy should not go completely out the window. While the first few months will take adjustment, and you’ll likely be exhausted, the sooner you can get back to a state of normalcy, the better you’ll start to feel. However, it will take some work on your part to continue your hobbies as you’ll often be quite tired.

There are two main hobbies which I have, and which I write a lot about here: reading and healthy living, especially working out. For me, those are two of my favorite things to do. They bring me joy and a sense of accomplishment. They are important to me, and so they are prioritized in my life.

For others, there are going to be other hobbies that they really enjoy doing. You may love to play video games, or you may be really into writing, or you may really like to woodwork. Whatever it is that you enjoy, you should find time to make that a part of your life, even after you have kids. You’ll find a much better emotional balance by doing things that you enjoy.

However, just because you continue doing things that you enjoy, that doesn’t mean you’ll be doing them as much as you were before. Your job will now be parent first, hobbies and other activities second. You need to be prepared to spend less time doing whatever it is that you enjoyed before becoming a parent. As you spend more time being a parent, and trying to find ways to also enjoy your hobbies, you’ll be able to spend more time doing both, but initially it will be an adjustment period. I’ve written about how I find time to read, and how to workout as a parent, but those are things I’ve learned over several years - they weren’t things I was doing right after my first child was born.

Beyond keeping yourself more emotionally stable, finding time for your hobbies is a great way to pass those interests on to your children. If your kids see you reading, or playing a sport, or doing whatever it is that you like to do, they’re much more likely to enjoy those things as well. If you spend all day looking at your phone or computer, don’t be surprised if your child grows into the same habits.

However, just because you enjoy something doesn’t mean your child will. You should not force them into liking something just because you do. It is a great way to get them involved in things you like but there’s no guarantee that they will like it. The real goal of spending time doing things that you enjoy is to help keep you in a better emotional state.

Ultimately, spending time doing the things you enjoy, while also being a parent, will help you to survive the tough periods of parenting. If you know that you’ll be able to enjoy something that you really like, trying to potty train your child will be just slightly less burdensome - at the very least you’ll have something to look forward to.

Spend time on yourself as well as your kids. You’ll find that taking care of both will go a long way in making parenting an easier job.