I Love the Crying; I Love the Whining

Crying and whining are part of the experience you will have as your child is born and begins to grow up. A newborn has no way to communicate with you other than to cry - that is how they are able to voice their opinion and needs. Once they learn to talk (at the toddler phase), then they will still cry, but they will also learn to whine. Once they are past the toddler phase, they will keep doing both, just louder.

If you’ve never had a child before, then you may be excited for the crying. That means that you’ll have your baby in your arms, and you’re no longer waiting. However, once you have that baby in your arms, you may not be as excited about the screaming any longer. The crying that your baby does will often be at hours when you’d normally be getting a full night’s sleep. You may connect it with sleep deprivation.

Once you hit the toddler stage, you may long for the days when all your baby could do is cry. Now they not only cry, but they scream, and whine, and raise their voice even when they want something. The meltdowns can be a complete nightmare to deal with - they’re not fun sometimes and you simply want to get away at times (you do at the newborn/baby phase as well when you haven’t slept).

Toddlers are also pretty good at annoying parents. They’ll ask for the same thing a hundred times, even if you’ve told them to stop it or that they’ll get something later. They want to watch something, or look at your phone, or have some type of food. Whatever the case may be, they’ll make sure you hear about it and constantly ask you about it. Toddlers simply haven’t learned enough patience yet - they’re teaching it to you though.

All of these phases come and go as your child grows - there really is a good side to all of it. You’re actually seeing your child grow, and you’re there for it. There are plenty of older parents who would love to re-experience some of these moments that seem not so magical at the time. They’d happily enjoy it, at least for a little while, if they could. In the moment it often seems like the worst, but that’s not always the case from a different perspective.

Which phase is the best? Well, that really depends on you and your child. Some people love the baby phase. They love being able to hold their baby close, snuggling with them, and simply being completely responsible for another human. They don’t mind that they can’t fully communicate with them. This can be a truly great experience for many, but can be a nightmare phase for other parents.

Some parents prefer to be able to communicate with their child in a way that the child is understanding what they’re saying. They are able to tell you what they want, and they give real hugs and kisses. They’re able to take care of themselves to some degree, and they will let you know if they need something. They interact with other kids, and play with siblings. They don’t require your constant attention.

Which is better - they’re both great in their own way. If you love the baby phase, that’s great. If you love the toddler phase, awesome as well. What’s really important is learning to love as much of parenting as you can. It’s not always fun - a lot of time it’s not. Find the good parts and hold onto them because you’ll miss them when they’re gone.