Getting Kids to go to Sleep at Night

I have a few friends and acquaintances that are shocked at how well our kids go to sleep at night. They don't try to play a lot of games to get out of going to sleep, and when it’s time for bed, they go through the routine that we’ve laid out.

Of course, when I ask my friends about their bedtime routine for their kids, they don’t really have one. It goes a long way in explaining why they might be surprised how easily our kids go to sleep at night.

All of this is not to say that our kids don’t want to stay up, and they don’t say that they don’t want to go to bed - there’s plenty of complaining when bedtime is announced. However, once we’ve got them going through the routine, the whining stops and we get down to the business of getting ready for bed.

Below are several of the routines that have worked well for us.

Make bedtime long enough that they can cool down from the day

You want your kids to cool down from the day when they’re getting ready for bed. A 5 minute bedtime routine probably isn’t going to work, especially for younger kids. You need to make sure that your routine is long enough for them to know it’s time for sleep, and gives them enough time that they start to forget about whatever they were just doing.

That doesn’t mean that the whole time has to be in their room. You can start your routine well before they get to their room by getting them engaged in something calming before they head to their room to sleep. For example, you could end your day with coloring or writing about what they did that day. This could be a signal to their brains that it’s time to get ready to sleep after they complete their picture or writing. While this is one idea of something you could do before going to their room, there are plenty of other things that might work better for your kids.

Have them do as much of the routine on their own as possible

As your kids get older, have them run the routine on their own. Bath, brushing their teeth, getting changed, and so on are all things they can do by themselves. While you may need to direct and remind them, your kids can start to do these things on their own as they grow.

By letting them do these things on their own, there are two things you’ll be teaching them. The first is self independence. You won’t always be brushing your kids teeth, or getting them clean. By letting them do it themselves, they begin to feel more responsible for themselves.

Second, letting your kids run the bedtime routine will help them as they grow older to understand the things they should be doing as they prepare for bed. The idea is that they’ll be able to go to sleep easily even when older (think teenage into adulthood) because they know how to have some semblance of a bedtime routine.

Read, sing, or entertain in some other way

Photo by Lina Kivaka from Pexels

This is yet another way in which your kids know it’s bedtime. I mentioned that coloring or drawing might be something that you could do as part of your bedtime routine. Other ideas include reading and/or singing.

We love to read at night before bedtime, and we read several different books as part of that. For others, singing songs may be an enjoyable and relaxing activity. A combination of the two is great as well. The goal is to entertain your kids in a relaxing way.

Be consistent

This is by far the most important factor. You have to be consistent in your routines - you can’t regularly skip or miss a night. Your kids need the consistency at night to really be good about getting ready for bed.

This is the number one reason our kids are so good at going to sleep at night. We basically never miss a bedtime routine, even on the weekends. While our activities change a bit from night to night, they are consistently done through the week, starting at the same time.

Conclusion

Getting your kids to sleep at night can be one of the easier parts of parenting. Find a routine that works for you and be consistent with it.