Consistency As A Parent

If you’ve read many of our articles, you’ll see a common theme in many of them: be consistent. Whether we're writing about a job you must do as a parent, a new workout routine, or a way to learn new skills, the message at the root of all of them is to be consistent.

Consistency is something that a lot of people don’t implement in their life. Being consistent with something is actually quite hard - it’s easy to fall back into old habits and lazy routines. Trying to do something new in your life is hard without a consistent effort on your part to make it happen.

While being inconsistent in your personal life may not be the end of the world for you, once you have kids, it will make your life, and their life harder. Trying to raise children without consistency in their routines and your support will confuse your child. They will not know when they can or cannot do something, they will not learn to build routines in their own life, and it will set them up for a very hard road ahead.

If you have trouble with consistency, then you need to look at what options you have to fix that in your life. If you're the type of person that forgets things easily, set timers and reminders for yourself. This will help you to remember when it’s bedtime, or bath time, or whatever the task may be.

If on the other hand you’re not easily motivated to do something, then it’s time to reexamine why you’re doing it in the first place. You may be able to figure this out on your own, but if the problem is deeper than you are able to discover on your own, then it is probably a sign that you should look to counseling.

Children who grow up in a home with parents who are consistent, and have more structured routines, are much more likely to succeed later in life. They’ll have the structure to study better, learn more, and go farther.

That’s not to say that all kids without consistent love and support will fail, however, the odds of success are definitely stacked against them. As a parent, it’s in your best interest, and the best interest of your child, to be consistent in your parenting.

I often am asked about getting kids to sleep at night, or about potty training. There are two keys to these questions: every child is slightly different, and so may not react the same way as another child. Second, being consistent, even after failures, is the way to success. This means that even if your child refuses to pee in the toilet, or go to bed when they’re supposed to, you must be consistent in your actions. Delaying something, after you’ve started, can often have negative consequences when you try again later.

Being consistent doesn’t mean you’re perfect. There will be times when you forget to do something, or when you mess something up. The key to consistency is that you’re working towards being consistent always. When you do mess up, figure out why you messed up, and figure out how to fix it for next time. Beating yourself up over it won’t help. Finding a solution to your problem will.

Be consistent everywhere in your life, and it will lead both you and your child to great heights.